Top Ten Signs That Say "Baby, It's Cold Outside."

In advance of the near apocalyptic record setting cold temperatures here are the top ten signs that say, "Baby, it's cold outside!" 10. The fire in the fireplace has frozen solid.  9.  The ground cracks with every step you take.  8.  You've tuned Tokyo in so close that you're starting to speak the language.  7.  Runny noses are no longer running. They're frozen snot.  6.  The surfer dudes are like "Dude, where's my shirt?"  5.  No bare chested, bare breasted or butt cracks in sight.  4.  The weather people are like, "Told ya so."  3.  I haven't even raked my leaves yet.  2.  Snow Day? Before Thanksgiving? Really?  1.  Bite me, Mother Nature! This ain't funny no more.