When Laptops Attack

My new laptop and I have been having a lover's spat, if you will---it really tries to do what it is supposed to do and I keep telling it it isn't good enough and it's basically a piece of *hit! What is really frustrating for both of us is that the relationship is only 7 months old. What could we possibly have to fuss about? Plenty! My complaints on my laptop whom I affectionately call Shiba, short for Toshiba are: You're only a few months old and you've been to the Geek Squad 3 times. You had to have your adapter replaced because something got stuck somewhere. (Whoever heard of that happening?) UPS has lost you in transit twice and you ended up in Hope, Arkansas. (Watch out for that Clinton guy; he likes young things.) After being repaired twice, you started beeping and making odd noises and then didn't want to work at all. And my top complaint is that you needed your hard drive replaced and I lost all of those fabulously funny blog posts that I spent months working on. "What do you think about that, Shiba?" "Uh, I asked you if you wanted to back up your files several times. And you really shouldn't bang on me every time you make a typo. And you probably shouldn't have dropped me on my head either..." Oh, shut up!