Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Cock-A-Doodle.....Dead...Part I

I've mentioned before that my mom lives way up a holler halfway up the side of a mountain. It's kinda out in the boonies if you know what I mean. Anyhow, the men in my family have always had chickens and Mom has hated every one of them. She likes having fresh eggs but not the messes that they leave behind. Invariably, one always seems to get out of the hen house, scratch around in her perfectly manicured flower beds and leave her a present on the front porch that she always steps in.

Damn chickens!

Over the past few years all of the chickens had either died or disappeared. Or, maybe, they just flew the coop. Mom no longer had any chickens, and she was glad.

One morning the next door neighbor that shares part of a driveway with her came over for a chat and mentioned that his Grandma that lived up the next holler had too many chickens and he was going to take a few and start him up an egg business. Dad had always shared his eggs with the neighbors and this fellow missed eating fresh eggs for breakfast. Before you knew it, those chickens had multiplied faster than ants at a summer picnic.

All of this would have been fine if he had built a chicken coop to keep those nasty things locked up, but he didn't. They were everywhere. In Mom's flower beds, leaving messes on both the front and back porches, crowing and clucking at all hours of the day and night. There's nothing worse than chickens that work on the third shift--up all night and sleep all day.

"Fire, Fire! My house is on fire," screamed the neighbor. "Call 911..."

7 comments:

Queen-Size funny bone said...

oh I hate chickens and roosters. go on what happened?

Sherry said...

Yuck.
I like fresh eggs, too, but ----

Lauren said...

I'm afraid of birds. Dunno why. HAve a good friend in TX that has chickens, although they are free range they are fenced in. She tried to bring one over to me to pet and I freaked.

Sheila said...

Chickens are great! I mean I like them fried, baked or barbequed. What more could you ask for. I think your mom should have one hell of a cook out!

Under the Influence said...

Fresh eggs - yum. Chickens on the loose - yuck.

lizB said...

Ah, well, I'll have to be the voice of dissent. I love chickens. Always have them. Well, we have four acres, so there's room. Our rooster's name is Hugh Hefner and the chickens are just "The Playmates," though the kids give them each their own names. You haven't lived until you've seen 30 chickens demolish a left-over birthday sheet cake.

Liz

indy said...

i agree with my friend sheila. go have a cookout.

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