Friday, January 20, 2012

Calling Publisher's Clearing House...Part II

...I'm sure Publisher's Clearing House receives all sorts of weirdo and wacky phone calls and mine turned out to be no exception:

Publisher's Clearing House (PCH): "Hello, this is Ambrosia. How may I help you?"

MAFW: "Hey, I have a question about an invoice I received?"

PCH: "Okay, not a problem. Do you have the customer order number?"

MAFW: "Yes, it's 24567palm5671985."

PCH: "Could you repeat that, please? I'm showing one letter missing."

MAFW: "Uh, okay. it's 24567palme5671985."

PCH: "Okay, got it. Can you give me the last four digits of your credit card for verification?"

MAFW: "Hold on. I gotta go get it."

PCH: "That's fine, I'll wait."

MAFW: "It's 2837."

PCH: "Okay, got it. Now, could you please tell me your high school mascot for verification?"

MAFW: "Sure, it was a Green Devil."

PCH: "I'm sorry. That's not the information you entered onto your form for security purposes. Could it be something else?"

MAFW: "Hmm, not a Green Devil? Okay, try a Devilish Darling? And my shoe size is 10."

PCH: "Okay, that got it. I didn't need the shoe size, though." (No sense of humor.) "What can I help you with today?"

MAFW: "I received an invoice from you guys and I also received a bill from Vanity Fair. Am I being double-billed?"

PCH: "I'm sorry. I don't understand the question."

MAFW: "Why did you guys send me two separate bills? I thought I was supposed to pay directly to PCH and not worry about any other invoices."

PCH: "Ma'am, according to my records we only sent you one invoice and I don't know anything about the other bill?"

MAFW: "Uh, why not?"

PCH: "Why not, what?"

MAFW: "Why don't you know about the Vanity Fair bill?"

PCH: "Ma'am, Publisher's Clearing House doesn't offer that magazine."

MAFW: "Oh!"

PCH: "Anything else I can help you with? If not, thanks and I hope you win the million dollars!"

Me too, because at the rate I'm going, I'm gonna need a million bucks to pay for all of these magazines...

3 comments:

Ellen said...

Par for the course, right? I run into this every single time I try to call a business. I just hate it. I no longer have a sense of humor with them. I avoid making calls because of this very thing. Thanks for giving me the chance to vent!

Confessions of a Closet Hoarder but you can call me Judy said...

I made the mistake of ordering some magazines a couple years ago and used my debit card. They ended up taking money out of my account, even though I'd cancelled the subscriptions. I had to cancel my debit card and get a new one. Never again.

And I've done this same type of thing before. I don't know why they don't want to help people like us. :D

MAFW said...

Ellen-I totally agree. Although when my Paypal got hacked a few months ago the customer service folks I dealt with were super.

Judy-You really have to be careful with your debit and credit cards these days. The thieves are out to get us, that's for sure.

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