What If I Don't Get In

I'll be honest; I'm already biting my nails, crossing everything that can be crossed and praying to every Saint, Deity and God that I have ever heard of in anticipation of what happens on December 1, 2015. No, the world isn't ending, but it may feel that way for some if they don't get in. I know you're probably wondering what could make me and several other thousand writerly folks resort to such measures and it's quite simply the registration date for a writing workshop that takes place every two years. But, this isn't any typical workshop. This is the Erma Bombeck Writer's Workshop that takes place at University of Dayton, in Dayton, Ohio, every two years. It's the only workshop in the country devoted to humor and trust me when I say not getting into the workshop is no laughing matter for those that have attended in the past. Teri Rizvi, Director Extraordinaire of the workshop has set up a Facebook page detailing when registration opens and encouraging past attendees to spread the word to other writers. That's where the trouble started. If we spread the word to other writers, won't that decrease my chances of getting in? I know everyone can't write humor--and that's a shame--because it's really hard to do. But this conference for humor writers is like an Ivy League school--it's really hard to get into and can definitely change your life--only it won't bust your wallet in the process. A past attendee and my friend, Janine, voiced what everyone was thinking: "I'll be on a plane flying from Budapest to India when registration opens and I'm going to HAVE to beg someone to register for me. What if I don't get in?" Another pal and past attendee, Mindy, says she now sets the alarm on registration day and missed out in '04 and '06 because she forgot when the date was. I knew exactly how both of my friends felt. Mom and I were cruising down the Danube River when registration rolled around last time and my friend, Kathie, had to do the registering for me. (She did get the biggest and best souvenir.) I won't be floating down the Danube this time, nor will I be way down yonder on the Chattahoochee--where it does get hotter than a hoochie coochie--no, I will be sitting at my desk, in my straight back chair watching the countdown clock that I have set up on my computer. It's at 28 days and counting… Not to be outdone by any of us is my friend, Pam, who has already made her hotel reservation. "If I'm not staying at the Marriott, I'm not going," she said. And in the next breath, "I hope I get in." I do, too, Pam. Because I've already made my hotel reservation, too.