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Moving To Cherry Fork Road

Cherry Fork Road was the name of the road that I was raised on. We moved from a rented house in 1971 to the farm that Mom and Dad had purchased in the middle of winter. I was very young, only four years old at the time, but I remember parts of moving day. It was cold and snowy. I don't remember who I was riding with--probably my mom; but, we were riding behind my papaw who was helping us move, and he was driving a big red truck. His big red truck was what he hauled the school lunch food in; I don't know how he got that job, but sometimes we would get extra goodies if the lunch ladies counted the inventory wrong. My school lunches growing up were really good so I didn't mind eating school lunch food at home. It sure beat eating deer meat. Anyhow, we had stuffed a lot of our belongings on the back of this truck and lying across the top of everything was a big rolled up rug that went in the living room. You probably know what kind of rug I am talking about. I believe it's called a corded circular rug--everyone had one back in the day. I remember going down a hill on the way to Cherry Fork Road and our new lives down on the farm when the rug, which wasn't secured properly, came off the back of the truck. Papaw, who was probably lighting a cigar or talking at the time, didn't notice that his load had become considerably lighter and kept on going. The rug hit the road and bounced up and landed on the hood of mom's car and made us slide over into the ditch. And there we sat. There weren’t any cell phones in 1971 so we had to wait until Papaw realized that we weren't behind him any longer. I can't remember how long we were stranded because I fell asleep in the backseat. The next thing I remember was waking up in my bed, in a new house, on Cherry Fork Road.

Mom's Birthday...Year IV

It's birthday time once again in the MA Fat Woman's family. Today is my Mom's birthday. Of course, I can't tell you how old she is because that wouldn't be daughterly. She is older than me but hasn't reached that age where she goes around telling everybody how old she is. For example: One might ask, "It sure is beautiful weather we're having." "I'm 87," might be the response. I'm really lucky to be her daughter. Mom always has a unique and mostly upbeat attitude about things which is very helpful during stressful times. Her calming manner has defused many a situation at home and at work. She's mostly retired now, and enjoys her dance lessons and Travel Club meetings. She's a fun person to be around and I'm glad she's my mom. Here's to you Mom! Happy Birthday!

It's Officially Spring!

It's officially spring, at least that's what the calendar says. I don't know if I agree with that or not because it's been over 80° for at least ten days in a row. I saw a graphic that the jet stream has permanently moved north to Canada; I thought that was supposed to be the other way around. Hello, snowbirds! So, even though it is the official first day of spring, I disagree, and think that spring has sprung and summer has begun. Anyhow, I know it's really early in the year to be saying this, but it needs to be said. Stay cool!

Conversations Of The Digestive System...Namely Mine

"Holy Crap! What was that?" "Hey, Biggy, (large intestine) you push anything out yet?" "Yo, Smalls, (small intestine) it hasn't even made it here yet!" "Hey, Mack, (stomach) what's going on up there?" "Fish and chips without the chips. Ribeye steak without the tater. Fried chicken with no mashed potatoes. Asparagus." "Fresh cole slaw made from scratch. Hey MAFW? Are you trying to kill us down here?" said Mack. "I ain't recognized anything you've been putting in me. Where's the tater chips?" "Yeah! Hey, Lady? We ain't had a biscuit down here in about three months. Ya trying to starve us or somethin'?" said Smalls. "Hey, Lady? Smalls is right. Are you paying attention to us? I ain't seen any greasy cheeseburgers in a long time. My walls are even starting to come clean from all that ruffage crap you been feeding us. Ruffage; now, that's funny!" said Biggy. "Hey, Mack! She's been eating R-U-F-F-A-G-E." "Ruffage! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! Oh my! You've never eaten ruffage before. The next thing you know you'll be eating beets and rutabagas. Hey, fellas? The MAFW is gonna start eating beets and parsnips...lololol" "Beets? Yuck!" said Smalls. "I hope she stays away from the onions; those things stink!" "Yo, anyone seen Chubs (fat) lately?" asked Biggy. "Fellas, you don't have to worry about the onions; I'm allergic, remember? But, I am trying to get healthy, so ya'll better shape up. As for Chubs, he's down about 30 pounds and has learned to keep his mouth shut. Now, where'd I put that recipe for pickled beets....."

National Potato Chip Day

Today, March 14, is National Potato Chip Day. In honor of that, I give you Herr's Sour Cream & Onion Potato Chips, the best tasting chip in the world. At least in my opinion! If you get the chance, give them a try! I have to order mine on the Internet because they aren't in the area where I currently live. You can order yourself a bag or two at Herr's and see for yourself. I wish I had a bag right now...

Where Have All The Famous People Gone?

Have you noticed the absence of famous people on television? With the latest announcement of the new cast of Dancing With The Stars and its not so famous list of stars it got me thinking about where have all the famous people gone. I think it's because of reality television and the recession that all of the famous people have gone bye bye. Of course, I could be wrong. Let's start with one of the local channels in my viewing (Atlanta) area. The network broadcasts local news from 4:30 a.m. - 7:00 a.m., an hour from 12-1, three more hours from 4-7 and then 11-11:30 p.m.; that's seven hours of just local news. And then you have 7-9 a.m. of national news, then 6:30-7:00 p.m. and then Nightline from 11:30-12:00. There may be even more news on in the middle of night; not sure, I can't seem to stay up that long. Grand total- 10 hours of news. Don't even get me started of reality television. What does this mean? It's a lot easier to add another hour of news than to add another talk show to replace Oprah. At least that's what the network did in my area. No problem, said Oprah. I'll just start my OWN Network. And that's the problem. I have basic cable and her new network is not included in the basic plan; you have to upgrade to the digital package to blah, blah, blah. What a load of crap! I guess I'll just watch the extra hour of news. But, you never know, from what I heard about the ratings on her new network and that of the national networks, a reunion might be in the making. Until then, well, I can always catch Conan on the Tonight Show...Oh, wait! Didn't he go ....